I did not work on Friday. This was the biggest mistake of my career so far.
While I was gone they hung a deer head over my work space. It is huge. And dead. And yet STILL STARING AT ME.
I am frightened.
I mean okay, there have always been dead ducks hiding in corners all over the place here, but...the deer, man. The deer gives me the willies. I don't think it's happy to be dead. I'm pretty sure it's going to get together with the ducks and they are going to rise up as one body and smite us or something.
I would just like to go on the record as saying I think the ritual of killing and stuffing and preserving something so that it looks like it might still be alive is primitive and barbaric and senseless and please don't eat my soul because I had nothing to do with this.