Sunday, March 4, 2012

Night of the Living Yuppies

Today my husband and I attended church, ate brunch with a friend, went to the mall, and then came home to putter around the house. Teenage me would bitch slap me for such a suburban cliche of a day, but I kind of liked it.

To be fair, "brunch" occurred at a Waffle House and "putter around the house" actually means "played Guitar Hero for four hours until I cooked dinner and we watched East Bound and Down".

So it could be worse.

Bonus "view of a marriage" conversation:

While we are playing Words with Friends against one another, in the same room:

Him: Did you like how I crushed you with that last word?

Me: You crushed me? You beat me by 5 points. How the hell did you crush me?

Him: Because I was saving it and you thought you were ahead and then I pulled it out in a last minute defeat.

Me: You didn't crush me. Crushing involves a larger point margin.

Him: I crushed you. I more than crushed you. I ripped your beating heart out of your chest and then I defecated in the bleeding hole. You will never recover.

Me:...It is nice to not always be the crazy one in this relationship.

Him: Crushed. You.


  1. Hahahahaha. For some reason, I get giddy reading dialogues between husband and wife. This one was one of the best ever.

  2. Did you tell him about the time I played "wedgie" for like nine billion points? THAT is what a crushing looks like.