So my latest neurosis is so cliched its disgusting, and I hate myself a little bit, but I can't help it. I'm having something of a mid-life crisis, except I'm only 28, so I hope its not LITERALLY a mid-life crisis. Maybe I'm just getting it out of the way early so when I'm 40 I don't have to worry about it. I've always been something of an overachiever.
So, I've pretty much come to the point where I believe that I will never be sexy and hot again. Maybe its all the 19 year old summer help we hired around here calling me fucking MA'AM or maybe its my husband.
Scene: Getting ready for work last week
Him: You look like a Pentecostal.
Me:...I...what?
Him: You look like one of those Pentecostal chicks.
Me:...I don't know what to say to that, really, but I'm going to change clothes.
A few minutes later:
Him: Now you look French.
Me: What does that mean?
Him: I don't know, you just look French.
Me: Didn't you used to say things like, "You look pretty today"?
Him: Yeah.
PENTECOSTAL. He told me I looked PENTECOSTAL. I guess I can just go ahead and go through menopause and die now.
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Aww. Don't give up--you can be hot and sexy at any age! And I bet you still are.
ReplyDeleteLooking French is probably a good compliment, though! French woman, not getting fat, sophisticated, all that jazz.
You just need to come up with something equally horrible to 'compliment' him on.
ReplyDeleteLike, "Hey, your gut looks much better in those jeans that the others."
Or, "Wow babe in this light you can't even tell that you're going bald/grey."
That'll do it.
Um.. just... what.
ReplyDeletePentecostal?
I don't even know what to say. I'm sorry you had to experience this.
PS - there is niche porn for EVERYTHING.
ReplyDeleteKelly L--all too true.
ReplyDeletePentacostal??
ReplyDeleteGod, men are thick.
Just found you via The Doll House.
ReplyDeleteThis story cracked me up! I had to cut my hair because of the same response from my husband. Not that there is anything wrong with being Pentacostal, however, not the look I am going for thanks.