Friday, July 16, 2010

That Girl is Poi-i-sonnn

I was trudging determinedly up the last hill of my run last night. I only had about half a mile to go before I was done. The heat index was 107 and the humidity was approximately 1,000%. I looked like I'd stood in the shower in my clothes, and I was contemplating how awesome it would be if I could have gills like Kevin Costner's. Courtney Love was grating in my ear about a skinny little bitch and I was doing my best impression of the little engine that could. And then...

Poison truck.

I got doused by the mosquito fogger.

On the plus side, no mosquitoes will breed on me for at least the next month, so I've got that going for me.

****

My husband told me I looked Pentecostal again this morning. Which was not as well received as the last time. He has been married just long enough that he doesn't always realize he is ABOUT to put his foot in it, but he always knows immediately afterwards exactly what he shouldn't have said. So he backpedaled and said I looked like a SEXY Pentecostal chick. Oddly, that didn't make me feel any better about it.

****

And now my work computer just tried to commit ritual suicide by flinging itself to the floor and smashing into my ankle. Awesome. I have no proof that these two incidents are related, except of course for the fact that they TOTALLY ARE.

I think maybe I won't be driving anywhere for lunch today. Just as a precaution.

8 comments:

  1. I don't know now you run in humidity. I think the only reason I was able to run is that I live in the desert.

    Although that's about to change .... I'm scared! And mosquito trucks? Yikes.

    ReplyDelete
  2. maybe one day you'll be as sexy as Michelle Duggar.


    a girl can dream...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Ells: I'm going with adaptation, since I've lived with it my whole life. And yes, I hate the mosquito trucks. They are surprisingly sneaky, and god forbid the city tell you when they will be spraying so you can, you know, AVOID being doused with toxic chemicals.

    Lucky: I'm going to call you Lucky, and also, I sort of wish you DID have a gun. I'm going to go put on my muumuu and my hairnet and pray for death now.

    Also, the Michelle Duggar thing is particularly appropriate since we're from the same freaking state.

    ReplyDelete
  4. First, let me say thank you. I am now going to be going down to work singing Bel Biv Devo. I love that song and had just managed to get it out of my head. Now...can't get it out of my head. *sigh*

    I think in parts of the world mosquito spray is considered very sexy.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I hate the friggin' heat. I ran about half a mile the other day and was cramping up. I'm so not built for this weather.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Don't underestimate the value of not having mosquitos breed on your for a month.

    ReplyDelete
  7. 1. People that run are crazy. People that run in rampant humidity are CRAZIER.
    2. *facepalm*
    3. this is not at all related but I'm really pissed off that I don't have your email address because I always want to hit reply on all of the emails with your comments but i CANT because all I get is that "noreply@blogger" whatever and it makes me sad Kelly because your comments are like my favorite thing ever and I can't even respond to them. FIX THIS. (aka: I need your email address.)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh I hate mosquitoes. :( Even WITH the mosquito truck dumping on me, I know I'd be a target.

    ReplyDelete