Tuesday, February 23, 2010

The Humans are Dead

I bought these shoes. Yes, the exact shoes in that picture above. If you think they look flashy in the picture, imagine them more. More silver. More shiny. Very, very much more. In fact, they sort of make me look like some sort of human/cylon hybrid. I've had the phrase 'robot feet' stuck in my head all day, and I might have spoken in a robot voice for part of the day. Which might have been embarrassing if that might have happened in front of one of my bosses. When I tried them on last night, my husband said they made me look "special" and I'm pretty sure he didn't mean "special" like a million dollars special. More like "special needs, special services" special.


These shoes promised to totally improve my ass, legs, posture, joint health, and abs and they might have even promised to do the dishes and walk the dogs. And since I bought them directly from the sweat shop in Korea, they only cost like $20.00.

So the deal is, you just wear them. To the store, to the gym, just going about your life, and they work miracles. I figure $20.00 doesn't make me too much of marketing martyr if they don't really deliver.

But seriously, these are some freaking ugly shoes.


  1. If it makes you feel any better, I have a pair of Crocs.

  2. Yeah but if they work you can be all, IN YOUR FACE EVERYONE I LOOK GREAT. So good luck with that.

  3. These are pretty much the shoes the Jetsons promised us.

  4. tina: Maybe we can round up all the bloggers with some questionable foot wear and find a way to make that marketable.

    erin: I may have told my husband that at least I would be the Down Syndrome chick with the hottest ass. He is probably re-thinking his life choices about now.

    kurt: Yes. I would have rather had the flying car, or the robot maid that does everything for me. But at least the shoes are a start.

  5. I can't even comment on the shoes because I'm so pumped about the Flight of the Conchords post title.

  6. To improve my ass, I just wear my four inch pumps while I'm vacuuming and doing laundry...of course that would probably be more effective if I actually, you know, cleaned and stuff. Plus, pumps with jammy pants is a hottest combination I can think of.

  7. I... I have no words. These shoes have left me speechless. Amused and speechless.