When I was 15, a deer followed me home. My mom, my stepsister, and my stepfather and I lived behind the back of beyond at this time, on a fish hatchery. Wildlife was not an oddity, and animals have always loved me. So it didn't strike me as all that strange that a deer would follow me home. No, I am not a Disney Princess. But apparently I'm about as smart as one.
I let the deer into the house. Please don't ask me why, because I'm not very clear on the answer to that one. I imagine it was a combination of I was stupid and my stepsister saying, "That's so cool! See if it will follow you in! We could have a pet deer!" Perhaps we had confused a deer with a dog. We were not confused for long.
Ways a DOG is Different From a DEER:
1. I have never been punched in the head by a dog. I HAVE been punched in the head by a deer.
2. A dog will not kick you in the stomach. A deer will kick you in the stomach, the knee, and anywhere else it can land a kick.
3. When you pet a dog, the dog will enjoy it, generally. When you pet a deer, it will try to bite your hand off.
4. A deer has hooves. A dog does not have hooves.
5. When your mom discovers you have let a dog in the house, she will be moderately irritated and give you a stern mom face while she makes you take it back outside. When your mom discovers you have let a deer in the house, she will scream for a very long time. Also, you may have to pay for things that were damaged. And you might not want to try to leave your room for awhile.
I learned these lessons the hard way so that you don't have to. You're welcome.